What does “take up your cross” look like?

 I recently started a new Bible study that takes you through the life of Jesus as we prepare for Easter Sunday. Today’s verses were Matthew 16:24-25. “Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.” These verses got me to thinking about what it would look like in my life to take up my cross and follow Jesus. My first thought was, “How do I apply this verse to my physical health. If you don’t know I have recently lost 130 lbs, and I’m still working on my physical health. Then I asked myself, “What would this look like in my holistic health?” Meaning emotional, spiritual, mental, physical, and relational health. I wanted to share some of my thoughts about this, so I figured a blog post would be the perfect way to do that. So, let’s get started, shall we?

What does “take up your cross” look like in my emotional health? Well, it means that although my emotions are valid, but they are not always true. God made us in His image. (Genesis1:26)  God has emotions and so do we. But our emotions can steer us wrong at times. For example, if I encounter a person in the store and that person is distant and distracted, I may feel that this person doesn’t like me, or that I did something to make her mad at me. In reality, this person is having a bad day, just got bad news, is exhausted, or a number of other things, and just couldn’t give more than she did at that moment. My emotions are valid, but they are not true in this example. We must always stop and think before we react, or overreact, and not let our emotions control us. Even if our emotions are true, we need to work through our emotions with God as our compass, letting go of unforgiveness, anger, hurt, and bitterness.  I know that this is so extremely hard to do, but it is necessary for us to do.

What does “take up your cross” look like in my spiritual health? I must always make God the ultimate priority in my life. I need to spend time daily in God’s Word, reading it, studying it, and memorizing it. I need to ask God to show me how to apply His Word to my life. I need to be constantly in prayer to Him. (1 Thessalonians 5:17) Telling God everything about me and my life. Yes, He already knows He wants to hear it from us anyways. He is my best friend (John 15:14-15), so why shouldn’t I tell Him everything? And I need to praise and worship Him. I have so much to be grateful for. I have salvation, forgiveness, mercy, grace, sanctification, justification, healing, strength, courage, hope, and so much more. He deserves my praise and worship. I also need to attend church services with other believers as Hebrews 10:25 says. So many times I have just wanted to stay home and isolate myself, but being around fellow believers rejuvenated me and helped me to keep on keeping on.

What does “take up your cross” look like in my mental health? Mental health is so important, and there seems to be a stigma about our mental health, especially in the church. The phrase “too blessed to be stressed” is one that I really dislike. This phrase invalidates me and my emotions. Should I trust God instead of stressing out over so much? Absolutely! But being invalidated doesn’t help me at all. It makes things worse. What I need to do is to examine every thought and take it captive to the obedience of Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:5) I need to know scripture so that I am able to recognize the lies that Satan tries to tell me, and the refute those lies with God’s Word. I must take those lies captive and send them back to the pits of hell where they belong, then I need to replace those lies with God’s truth, His Word. I must remember who I am and Whose I am. I am a child of God (1 John 3:1-2) I am chosen. (1 Peter 2:9) I am made in His image. (Genesis 1:27) I am valuable (Matthew 6:26) I am forgiven. (1 John 2:12) I am redeemed. (Ephesians 1:7) To have good mental health I must apply godifdence to my life. Godfidence is the knowledge that I cannot do anything but that God CAN do it through me.

What does “take up your cross” look like in my physical health? Well, it looks like doing everything, that is in my power to do for my physical health. This means many things. To be healthy physically I must make sure to fuel my body adequately, hydrate adequately, move my body with exercise, and get the rest that my body needs. My body is a temple (1 Corinthians 3:16) after all, and I need to take care of it. This does not mean that I need to exercise excessively, overly restrict my calories, or focus so much on food and counting calories that food is the only thing I think about. My body is a temple, but its not an idol, and neither is food or exercise. Notice that I haven’t said anything about weight so far. Why not? Because the number on that scale A.) does not define me, and B.) I have no control over. If I did, I would have been down to my goal weight years and years ago. Yes, weight is AN indicator of physical health. But it’s not the only indicator AND there are so many factors, that I can’t control either, that make weight gain extremely easy and weight loss extremely hard. I need to focus on the things that I can control. Taking up my cross means that I consistently do what I can do to better my physical health. That might mean I get up and do my workout even when I don’t really want to. It might mean that I grab a piece of fruit instead of a piece of cake. It can look like making sure my plate has enough protein, carbs (yes, I said carbs!) and vegetables to adequately nourish my body, instead of just grabbing a bag of chips and calling that a meal. This doesn’t mean that I can never have chips or cake. It just means that I put more emphasis on the better for me foods than the not so good for me foods.

What does “take up your cross” look like in my relational health? Relationships are hard! But relationships are necessary. God said that was not good for Adam to be alone (Genesis 2:18) God created us for relationships. Relationships with Him and relationships with each other. John 13:34 tells us to love one another. Proverbs 27:17 says that “as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Mark 2:1-12 tells us of a man who was healed because his friends brought him to Jesus. God meant for us to be in relationships with each other. When I’m going through a hard time my friends and my church family are there for me. They pray for me and with me and they encourage me. And oh, what an encouragement they are too! To be healthy relationally not only must I have friends, but I must be a friend. Being a friend is hard too. Many times, I say the wrong thing, or I offer advice at the wrong time. Sometimes people just need to hear “I’m sorry you are going through this and I’m here for you.” They don’t need you to “fix it” they just need you to be there. I often say the wrong thing at the wrong time. I am aware of this and I’m working on it. And I hope and pray that my family and friends forgive me when I mess up. Sometimes I get hurt in relationships. Ok, a lot of times I have gotten hurt in my relationships. I have known people who are narcissistic and controlling and don’t care about anyone but themselves. These people can really hurt you and cause lasting damage. But the majority of people are just trying to get through life. There almost always is a reason that a person does what they do. Some sort of past trauma, something they are struggling with at the moment, or just not knowing what needs to be said or done at the time. That’s why forgiveness is a key part of relationships. Forgiveness is extremely HARD! I have had to forgive people for things that should never have been done to me. Things that have left lasting scars on me. But I realized that forgiveness wasn’t about them, it was about me. I have to let go and forgive so that I can heal and grow. And I still struggle with it at times, ok a lot of times. That selfish part of me wants to hold on and be bitter and angry to punish that other person. But it only ends up punishing me instead. The more I hold on to it, the more that wound grows and festers. It’s only when I let go, forgive, and give it to God that I have started to heal. How do you forgive someone who has hurt you so in so bad? The best thing that I can say is that you make a choice to forgive and ask God to help you to forgive. You may have to continually make that same choice for the same person for the same reason. Satan is going to keep bringing up that infraction to you and make you mad all over again. Choose to forgive once more. I know it’s hard. I’m not saying it is easy in any way. But if it was then it wouldn’t be taking up your cross and following Jesus now, would it?